In case none of you noticed, I’m a little bit obsessed with YouTube. I watch videos all the time, talk about it frequently, and post videos to my blog fairly often. It’s my go-to thing to do when I’m bored and can’t come up with something else to do.
Right now I’m watching Shannon Harris (Shaaanxo). Along with Tracy & Stephanie of EleventhGorgeous (TeeandEss) and Danielle Mansutti. There’s a few others that are mixed in with what I’ve been watching today, but mostly it’s been the three of them. I’m in love with these girls. I’ve talked about Shaaanxo and EleventhGorgeous before, but I don’t remember if I’ve talked about Danielle Mansutti.
She’s great, and she did this really awesome video (shown below) that really hit me and I wish the world would watch it.
This video is very emotional and made me cry. But it’s totally worth the watch.
Anyway, the reason I brought up YouTube today is more to talk about the idea of making videos for the world to see. It’s something I wish I could do. It’s something I’ve wished I could do for a while, but I have no idea what I would make videos about. And I’m terrified that no one would watch them. I mean, my blog barely has any readers and for a while I was posting every day. Maybe videos are more exciting and more people would look at them, I don’t know. I’m not sure I have anything interesting enough to post in videos. I’m not sure my blog is even interesting enough to post, but at least it gives me an outlet.
Maybe I need to look at YouTube the same way. Maybe I need to look at it like it’s just an outlet for me. Another way for me to express myself. But I am so terrified that I’m going to feel like a failure if no one watches the videos. And I’m afraid the videos would be really stupid. And I’m afraid that my family and friends might see it and be upset, confused, or entertained in a bad way by my videos. I don’t know, I’m afraid of a lot of things with this idea. But it’s really something I wish I could do.
I don’t want to make it my new career, I just want to be part of it. I feel like it’s been such a huge thing for so many people and made such an impact on so many people’s lives that I want to be a part of it.
Am I crazy for wanting to do that?